Y1:55 AM
ok prolly the last time i cried was an hour ago cos i was watching a hindustani movie. uhuh, that's so what the hell.
I DO NOT LIKE TO WATCH HINDUSTAN MOVIES
cos i know i'm commiting myself into something that involves tears. it's practically crying over... A SHOW. -_- that's very bullcrap. i know i know i could have switched to some other channel or whatsoever but gosh they always show crap shows on sunday. to me, that is. ok perhaps there WAS a nice show on, which i didnt realise. so, whatever.
hahahah, so my sister, mom and i hogged in front of the television and just .. cried. so what the hell lah. i know you guys might be thinking dude, the girl's out of her head man. lol, but i loved the show. shahrukh khan(???) knows how to act lah, he's really good. and the girl - preity zinta??? DUDE SHE'S GORGEOUS LAH!!!! oh well, everything ended ... and it's just a movie. wth man.
i cried a lot, and lol the mucus and all. horrendous lah. hahahah!! ok actually i feel a little queasy. i havent been sleeping well for the past few days. been taking care of my sister. and just.. you know.. being worried and all. followed her to the doctor early in the morning. i was still feeling dead groggy and tett, i just tagged along. the usual 1h bath became 20-30minutes?! dude, that's a huge achievement if you ask me.
doctor told us that it's all about the nerves. i dont know, i just dont think that's the whole problem. ok, im not a doctor so heck about my thoughts.
so got back and lied down on the sofa for a few minutes then sister asked me to get her fruits. lol, i nearly slept. actually brother, sister and i were watching naruto, on my brother's laptop. but i was too tired i just.. zonked out. she had that 'yikes! i woke her up' look though. hahaha, but it's alright.
i really want to sleep but somehow or rather i just cant. actually, the movie made me think. about certain stuff. like how you shouldnt take someone/something for granted. yeah perhaps ive taken certain things for granted. ive planted too much hope on certain things, or certain people. therefore, i shall change my mindset with effect of today.
i miss certain people. and let me just be bias.
abee, afee, syaz, hanis, een.
i miss those people. a lot.
it takes someone courage to be truthful. and you just got to appreciate it, whether or not you like it. cos, it's just wrong when you gave it all but what you get in return, is just something you dont wish to hear/feel/know. at least, be appreciative.
nay, nothing personal. whatever.
so i might want to do something with this poor lappie. send it for a repair or something? i dont know. perhaps a little spray work might do a little magic to it? tett, i dont know about that either.
i am very sleepy but i dont wish to sleep now. no one's really online to chat with me, aiyayai. i still have not given een her pressie. now im having doubts whether or not she will like it. so that is a very bad thing. and i really wish to go out with afee and abee soon. cos i miss them a frigging hell lot. well, at least i know theyll appreciate me missing them huh. whatever.
i am alone now. but i wish to seriously be alone somewhere more peaceful. ok, the house is quiet actually. but no, thats not what i mean by peaceful. i'm thinking of something more... sand.. rocks.. water.. beach. that's what i'm thinking of. i shall visit the beach soon. perhaps alone, or with someone. but that really sucks. it's like sometimes you have quite a number of friends (yes you love them yes you appreciate them) but you just want that particular one to be your best friend. again.
i need to start revising real soon. i havent been studying and that really worries me. amath retest will be held next week. and i havent been practising any questions for the past few days/weeks. i want to do well this time. i want to do well next year. i must. i need to. but everytime i hope for rainbow colours, i get a red. so it's always something that punches me everytime i collect my report slip.
hope i obtain lesser Fs next year. or maybe, zilch -zero Fs. that'll take twice or maybe thrice the effort i put in last year. whatever it takes to get at least a B. whatever it takes.
alright, i must start revising tommorow. hmm, i cannot wait for MY own grad night. that'll be next year. grad night will be the night(lol) when i can seriously just FRICKING ENJOY MYSELF and not worry about the bigmajoryayaya OLEVELS. i cant wait for that night. i'd be superduper elated and contented. oh you bet i will. and trust me, there'll be a transformation.
getting a little whirly now. so hope to blog later, when i wake up from my sleep. let's hope this time it'll be a good one.
sleep tight, Goodnight.
love,
sheikha
